


After Ragnarok

by IzHunny



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: No Smut, Post-Thor: Ragnarok (2017), Pre-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), and my fav disaster bisexual bros, everybody is just friends here, hulk is mentioned and almost makes an appearance, loki and valkyrie are bros, no pairings of a romantic nature, some light humor i hope, thor tells the story of ragnarok badly, tony is mentioned and referenced, valkyrie loki and bruce stop that nonsense with some nonsense of their own
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-04
Updated: 2018-06-04
Packaged: 2019-05-18 00:16:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14841929
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IzHunny/pseuds/IzHunny
Summary: First, I consider Ragnarok from the standpoint that the story is being told to the audience by Thor. After the fact, probably during a drunken feast, with much embellishing and exaggeration….





	After Ragnarok

**Author's Note:**

> WARNINGS: I neither address Ragnarok nor attempt to fix-it; Post-Ragnarok; Pre-IW; Unreliable Narrator; Characters behaving as my head canon dictates; general silliness and drunken shenanigans.
> 
> This is my first posted work here and may also be found on my tumblr. This is my first fan work ever. It is just a bit of fun. Enjoy.

Valkyrie, Loki, and Banner are quietly talking and drinking together nearby as Thor’s tales unfold. Occasionally rolling their eyes when Thor completely omits something or makes up more and more outlandish occurrences.

Right up until Thor tries to imply Hulk and Val were an item. A great love story for the ages, cosmic kismet, two souls split apart finding one another in the forsaken shithole of Sakaar, valiant warriors brought together across improbabilities of generations and space by the Norns battling for…

Valkyrie polishes off her mead, nudges Bruce to draw his attention. She glares at Loki who is on the floor, nearly wetting himself with silent laughter at Thor’s idiotic romantic imagery and trying to crawl away from Bruce, just in case.

Bruce, whose only had the one beer, listens for a moment. It is utterly ridiculous. Keeping a straight face while still observing the near hysterical giggling of Loki on the floor is no easy feat. Bruce does it, though. He turns to Thor, interrupting his tale with a pointed cough. Thor’s eyes are still aglow with inebriation, humor, and storytelling. He fails to register that Bruce and indeed Hulk are both sitting right next to him. And that Hulk’s epic, albeit fictional, love story was just the focus of his tale.

“What is it, Banner? Do you not enjoy a lusty tale of warriors finding love?” Thor grins to him and then the room at large, in that manner of his, goofy, bright, cocksure, but adorable, and shamelessly implying the story is about to become X rated if it continues.

Bruce ignores Loki rolling under the table, trying to get to a safe vantage point and still see what the reply is going to be, gasping for air, face wet. He’s not quite sure what to make of Loki like this. Val’s eyebrows are simultaneously expressing irritation and amused curiosity which is absolutely no help for anyone.

Bruce waits. When Thor’s gaze finally returns, Bruce turns a little green, leans slowly in, slams one not quite original peach colored fist on the table and bellows like a hurricane force wind in his face: “STOP MAKING SHIT UP OR I AM TELLING EVERYONE WHAT YOU WERE CRYING ABOUT WHILE YOU WERE IN HULK’S BED!”

Valkyrie snorts, composure lost at the implication, nearly joining Loki on the floor.

Loki let’s out a full belly laugh rolling back towards his brother. He begins smacking Thor’s shin repeatedly, “Yes, tell us,” he begs between breaths, “the tale of the pounding you took from the giant green lover from across the galaxy and how you came to be weeping in his bed!”

Thor looks mildly embarrassed, but Loki and Valkyrie are both laughing. Thor’s brows furrow as he realizes he’s brought this on himself, and worries only briefly if Hulk is going to emerge to set the story straight.

Bruce maintains the pretense of anger for approximately 3 seconds before joining the laughter. He thinks he may be laughing harder than that time Tony showed him the footage of his first indoor flight test and slammed himself into a wall and fell on a car. Good times. Thor joins the laughter because if you can’t finish it you shouldn’t start it. He is quietly impressed that Bruce and Loki managed to pull off this turn of the tables and continues with his amusements in great cheer, out of their range of hearing.

“Is he always like this? With the stories?” Bruce asks Loki, who is propped casually on one elbow on the floor in front of Thor’s now empty chair.

“My whole life, you have no idea.”

“That must have been a pain in the ass. Is sleipnir actually your son or …”

“I have never begat anything!” Loki spits out, then lightens his tone. “But I did do the goat thing, you know, to make a lady laugh. I won that bet. And the _kindness_ Skadi showed me afterward would make your hair curl if I were the type to share stories of that nature.” Ignoring Bruce’s giggle, Loki blinks at Val’s now very interested face.

Bruce looks between them several times, “what am I missing?”

“ _You?_ And _Skadi?_ ” disbelief dripping from each scant syllable.

“Oh, did you know her?” Loki lightly inquires. Klaxons sound in his head.

“Once or twice.” Val brazenly confirms, smiling into her drink, her eyes never leaving Loki’s. “I showed her a couple _kindnesses_ of my own.”

Bruce feels like he is watching a train wreck about to happen but still can’t stop himself from asking, “what sort of kindness exactly are we talking about here?”

Loki seems to go a bit pink at the challenge. Val smiles broadly waiting to see if he’ll answer Bruce’s question. The tension thick between the three seems to last an age. Just as Bruce abandons hope for an explanation which he isn’t sure he wants anyway, he tilts his glass up.

“It’s a tongue thing” the pair answer in unison. Bruce chokes on the last of his beer. Val slaps his back until he’s breathing air again.

Loki, with great sincerity, solemnly offers to Val, as only the truly inebriated can, “thank you, it is one of the most useful skills I’ve ever learned.”

“Okay, first, neither of you are allowed to talk about this, or tell Tony about this when we get to Earth. And second, just don’t even, no, you know what? Neither of you are allowed in the same room as Tony without a chaperone, and third, keep your damned tongues to yourselves.”


End file.
